How good is @happyendingpizza, you ask? Well, they provide so much pleasure that even their crabs are in fashion. The Holy Crab! is $28++ per pop, but holy crab indeed. Yes, I know chili crab pizzas are older than my goddamn alcoholism, but this one is a surefire seductress. And I have the sample size to prove my claims, believe me.

When Happy Ending said that their sterling sourdough pizza base was topped with SUCCulent crabmeat, they weren’t kidding. Ya see all that white stuff on her? That’s right fellas, that’s all authentic crabmeat! Granted, I couldn’t taste the sweetness that’s a hallmark of a fresh crustacean, but that’s mainly due to the captivating chili crab sauce. It trends more towards salty, spicy & sour than the usually sweet & salty chili crab sauce Singaporeans are used to, but it works wonders when paired with the charmingly chewy pizza dough. Some chili padis are on deck to spice things up a little more for the lads & ladies who like it extra painful, and the sharp red onions are there to whip the orgy back into order when any of the participants get out of line.

Speaking about the pizza dough, the main reason why Happy Ending is called...well, what it is, is because of the saucy dips that you can get for a little extra sumn’ sumn’. Needless to say, our lube of choice that night was the chili crab dip. It’s basically the same sauce that’s on the pizza, but taking the otherwise plain crust & spicing it up? Oh yeah, that’s the spot. For about thirty three bucks with the dip, this is pie is an orgasmic sensation that has to be achieved to be believed.

Better yet, round up your pals who like it saucy & spicy, head on down and use that sweet, sweet thirty percent(!) off your total bill that only #burpplebeyond can pleasure you with. Bang for your buck indeed. I will definitely come again, @happyendingpizza. And thanks to @burpple for hooking me up!